


Silence

by Sleepwalker7



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, SuperCorp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-19
Updated: 2018-06-19
Packaged: 2019-05-25 16:26:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14981009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleepwalker7/pseuds/Sleepwalker7
Summary: “It’s her silence that wakes me up.”Sometimes Kara struggles to handle the weight of the world on her shoulders. Lena is there to reassure her. One-shot.





	Silence

It’s her silence that wakes me up. 

She has the strange habit of mumbling in her sleep. It’s quiet, and nearly inaudible unless you know to listen for it. It’s beautiful, somehow, and soothing. 

Sometimes, I purposefully stay awake just so that I can listen to her. Simply listen, before falling asleep, cradled in her arms, wrapped up in her delicate noises.

Those are the moments that I love the most; moments of peace and comfort, of safety and tranquility, where she’s the center of my universe and I’m the center of hers; where we’re so close that we breathe each other’s air.

I roll over onto my side and prop myself up on my elbow, my face hovering over hers. She’s lying flat on her back, her legs tangled in the thin sheets that cover our naked bodies. One of her hands is placed on her stomach, rising and falling with every breath she takes, and the other one is white around the knuckles as it grips the edge of the mattress. Her jaw is clenched so tightly that my own bones ache in sympathy, and the vein in her temple throbs insistently.

“Kara.” I reach out to stroke her cheek with the back of my fingers, whispering softly into the darkness of the room. “Wake up, love.”

She wakes up with a start, her whole body tensing like a leopard ready to pounce. Her hand which still lies on her stomach clenches into a fist, and for half a breath, one trembling heartbeat, she falls completely still. My own breath freezes in my lungs as I wait, nervously, for those blue eyes to lock with mine; filled with an emotion I’m not sure I’m prepared for. 

She’s a strong one, my girlfriend, but so vulnerable at the same time.

“It’s alright.” I tell her, my voice steady, but barely.

Her eyes are rigid, and I can tell that whatever she’s seeing isn’t in the room with us, but a figment of her imagination. And I wonder, as my throat constricts so badly it feels like the skin has broken, what terrible thoughts are plaguing her mind. I throw caution in the wind and lean down, raining soft, whispers of kisses onto her jaw, my hand cupping her cheek. 

She tenses again but it’s different this time, and another heartbeat later, her body trembles as the tension flows out of her muscles in relieved waves. She blinks, slowly, and her eyes finally meet mine.

“There you are.” I breathe out, my thumb stroking her skin tenderly. “You okay?”

She nods after a moment of hesitation, and smiles softly. It doesn’t reach her eyes, though, and concern stabs at my heart. I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, and then another one, before she reaches up and covers my hand with her own. She pulls it away, turning her head to press a kiss to my palm, and a smile of my own tugs at the corners of my lips in spite of myself. 

She pulls me down so that I’m lying against her, seemingly comforted by my weight. My head rests comfortably on her chest, and I let out a breath of content when her arms wrap around my waist. Although I find comfort in the rhythmic movements of her chest below my ear, I can sense that she’s still wide awake and lost in troubled thought.

“Do you want to talk about it?” I speak up, and wiggle sideways so that my head is resting on her shoulder and I can look into her face.

“Hm?” She murmurs, meeting my gaze with a shyness that I’ve seen many times before.

“Something’s bothering you.” 

It’s not a question but a statement. 

When she remains silent, I reach up to gently smooth away the crinkle between her eyebrows. She’s gotten better at it through the years; the whole talking thing, but I know it still scares her. Whenever she does open up to me, though, it makes me, if possible, fall in love with her even more. It’s her vulnerability, more than anything else, that makes her so beautiful. Even now, as she stares back at me fearfully yet adoringly, my heart pounds away in my chest with an almost secret kind of certainty. 

“Tell me, babe.” I say as my hand settles on her cheek again.

She sighs deeply, as if the weight of the entire world rests on her shoulders. In a way it does, I suppose, and perhaps I’ve been blind to her worries all this time. 

Then again, maybe that isn’t entirely true because deep down, I have a feeling what this is about. 

“It’s nothing.” She says softly, but I know better.

To most people, her words would sound sincere; sincere enough to be accepted as the truth, but not to me. I press my lips to hers for a second, maybe to reassure her somehow, or maybe just selfishly to feel her touch. Either way, it seems to relax her. 

When I speak again, I’m almost whispering. “Don’t lie to me, Kara.”

She sighs again, but this time it’s a sigh of defeat. “It was just a stupid nightmare.”

“Hey, whatever it is, you can tell me.” I reply almost pleadingly, and maybe I have reached a certain level of desperation. All I want is for her to confide in me, let me share her burdens, but she has a stubbornness that won’t allow her to ease her silent suffering. I know that it’s her way of protecting me and although it endears her to me, I don’t need her protection.

“I...” She starts, but then closes up again. There’s a hint of something else in her eyes now as she blinks up at me, and suddenly realization dawns upon me. Frustration. I recognize it easily, and I can tell that she’s at a loss. She doesn’t know where to begin, so I decide to offer her a helping hand.

“Are you worried about something?”

I’m so proud of her for all she does for the city, but something seems to be holding her back and I’m determined to figure out what it is.

Her eyes flicker away from mine and my heartbeat falters. Just like that, I’m convinced that I just ruined it all; that I broke whatever magic was hovering above our heads. And as the silence stretches on between us, I begin to worry that she’ll shut me out, refuse to accept my help. 

But then she whispers a single word that tells me just how scared she really is. “Yeah.”

“About what?” I question, wanting to hear the words from her.

“I’m just...” She swallows, her cheeks coloring red. My heart flutters as it always does when she blushes. Even after all these years, some things never change. “I’m just anxious.”

And there we have it.

I can see the indecision in her eyes, hidden in the blue depths. I can see the movement in her throat as she swallows thickly, and she slides her arm out from beneath my head to sit upright, the sheets pooling around her waist. I follow suit, but instead of leaning against the headboard, I sit so that I’m facing her, my knees brushing against her thighs. 

Another long silence follows, but I don’t move or speak, because I know she’ll carry on when she’s ready.

And she does, eventually. “This is what I’ve always wanted to do. Help people. From the moment I arrived on Earth. And being labeled a hero... it makes me happy and I’m honored, but it also makes me nervous. Everyone trusts me. Everyone counts on me to save them. But sometimes it makes me feel... I don’t know.”

“Pressured?” I try to fill in the blanks for her, and she nods.

“I don’t want to let anyone down.” Her voice cracks on the last word, and again I hear her pain, the unmistakable fear. For a moment I’m sure my heart will never return to normal after this.

“You’ve never let anyone down before.” I tell her urgently, placing my hand on her thigh, the skin to skin contact as vital now as oxygen. “And you never will. I have no doubt about it. You are the greatest woman I’ve ever known, Kara Zor-El, and I love you with all my heart.” Her blush deepens at my words, and I smile tenderly. “Everyone supports you because you deserve it, and they will continue to support you no matter what happens. I believe in you, so you need to believe in yourself, too.”

She smiles weakly, but her eyes glisten with unshed tears. “How?Look at me. I can’t even stay in control of my emotions.”

Her tone is bitter and there’s shame in her eyes. The look on her face makes me want to gather her in my arms and never let her go. Instead, I caress her cheek with the tips of my fingers as I speak with all the confidence I can muster. Because my words are sincere. Every single one of them. 

“I believe in you because I know you, and who you truly are. You’re kind, funny, loving and brave. You’re my other half. And it’s okay to be scared sometimes. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. You might be strong, but even the girl of steel is not unbreakable, and I need you to know that when you break, I’ll be here. I’ll be here on your worst days, and I’ll be here on your best days.”

A small smile ghosts across her lips but the doubt is still there. Faintly, but still. It makes me continue.

“Even if you can’t manage to trust yourself, trust me because you know that I would never, ever lie to you.” I tilt my head slightly as I look at her. Her cheeks are wet and I realize that she’s crying. I gently wipe her tears away and take her face into my hands. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She replies shakily and all at once, my heart feels light again. She leans forwards and kisses me, softly at first but then more urgently. “Thank you.”

I don’t reply with words. Instead, I lean in to bring our lips together again, pouring all the love and joy that swells in my chest into the touch. Her fingers tangle into my hair, and I press myself closer to her, straddling her hips as I lose myself in her taste and her warmth. 

When we break apart, just a fraction of an inch, we’re both breathing heavier than before and her cheeks are completely flushed. She brushes the hair away from my face, and trails her fingers down the side of my neck. I shiver but don’t pull away.

“I love you.” She says again, her voice stronger now.

Any trace of fear or hesitation has left her eyes and I smile, leaning into her. 

She slides us down so that her head is resting against the pillows once again, me pressed against her chest with my head tucked beneath her chin, and her legs stretch out beneath the sheets. I snuggle further into her as her arms encircle my waist, pulling me closer. 

I listen to her heartbeat, letting it lull me into a state of calm, as my fingers gently trace over her stomach.

No more words are spoken, but they’re not needed. Her heart drums heatedly in my ears and I close my eyes as it beats words that can’t be spoken out loud. Her chest expands and deflates in a rhythm that’s almost hypnotic, and a comfortable feeling of peace settles over me. 

And as I’m hovering between awake and sleep, I hear it; the soft melody of the mumbles that escape her lips in the quietest of whispers. It’s familiar and somehow more beautiful than I remember.


End file.
